Weariness

Weariness has begun to set in and has brought with it some aches and pains. All I want to do is sleep or eat or watch TV. I shouldn't feel that tired because I'm not doing that much.

I am so fortunate to have a wonderful husband that has taken on the lion's share of making arrangements for my mother's funeral in Florida. He is my rock, my best friend and the love of my life.

I have a beautiful daughter and son (I hate the phrase in-law) that are going to travel to Florida and be there for the service. She will be my eyes since I won't be able to go. It hurts me that I can't be there FOR HER. Thankfully, she has a wonderful husband too.

Our son in Iraq can't be here but we've talked and his wife who is here in the states calls and instant messages often just to check in. She wanted to travel to Florida too but can't miss her school finals.

In Florida I have cousins who are helping by calling family and arranging a more personal service than having a pastor who didn't even know my mother speak about her. I'm sure it will be very meaningful for everyone there and I know it is what she would have liked.

Here in California I have the absolute best support system of friends that anyone could ask for - they hug me and care for me and they are just "there" if I need them.

But I am weary. Perhaps the past several months (not to mention the past week) have caught up with me... not only have they caught up, they are kicking my butt! So I guess I'll give into them for a little while which is soooo not me!

There was an article about our friend Gregg in the Sacramento Bee today - some of you have asked how he came to make the decision to end his own life, the article may help you understand. http://www.sacbee.com/content/news/story/14253189p-15069134c.html

Thank you my family and friends for loving me and sustaining me through difficult times. I love you!
Rox